Are You Completely Overwhelmed, Too?
Nancy Meyers and Diane Keaton didn't tell me there would be days like this.
Have you found yourself sitting at your desk in tears for no good reason? When everything that was okay yesterday is unbearable today?
I got stuck in a loop where I was in tears over nothing. Then I decided the best action would be to berate myself for daring to be sad when I have a home and health insurance with a co-pay I can almost afford. Next week, I am taking my 11-year-old daughter on my dream trip of a lifetime. Her first trip out of the country will be to Morocco. We are going to freaking AFRICA. Yet, I managed to fall into the trap in my mind that tells me I am a failure because my living room is filled with the contents of my closet. Because they are doing asbestos abatement in my apartment and replacing the plumbing in my bathroom and kitchen. And the Medicaid expansion is ending. And I needed help finding a Mandarin-speaking health insurance navigator for a client. And I still haven’t figured out how to get tinted lenses covered for my client with sensitive eyes. And my daughter is disappointed because she was not invited to test for entrance to a specialized high school. And maybe I should have been more on top of that, but adversity builds resilience, so maybe not?
CBT and DBT tools could be helpful, but sometimes I’m so far in a hole I need more help. Thankfully, I was already scheduled to see my shrink yesterday. She suggested upping my depression meds. And when I asked if my inability to stop crying could be hormonal, she said it would be worth checking out.
But that feels overwhelming too! (You may be an emotionally regulated person, thinking I am too much in my feelings. You are right!)
Patches, gels, or suppositories for my whoo ha? (I can say vagina, but something about talking about perimenopause turns me into my grandmother). I want an evidence-backed mid-life treatment calendar similar to a baby’s vaccination schedule. But what I want is unrealistic for a wildly diverse population of underserved amazing women. So I will continue to read and post questions like “What is the Endgame for HRT” to the r/Menopause community on Reddit. And I’ll be reading my copy of Dr. Jen Gunter’s The Menopause Manifesto as I drink mint tea on a rooftop in Marrakech next week!!!???!!! Ooo, how old is Michelle Buteau? Can she play me? Because that sounds like the start of a rom-com, I would watch the hell out of it.
Would you like to vent about all the petty and monstrous things in your life? I’ve opened the comments for paid and unpaid subscribers. No conversation is necessary—just a place to type and let it go.
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENTS
Speaking of meds, due to the end of the Covid Public Health Emergency, starting in May, prescribing mental health providers such as psychiatrists and psychiatric nurse practitioners you have never seen in person will no longer be able to prescribe controlled substances via telemedicine or virtual visits. So, in English: if you have received anxiety meds (Xanax, Ativan, Klonopin, etc.) only via video or phone, make an appointment and get your refills NOW. After May, you must see a prescriber in person at least once a year to have those meds prescribed.
I’ve also spent some time recently helping find long-term care for a family member. If you ever need a long-term nursing care facility for a loved one, use a database to help you find a not-for-profit. Studies show not-for-profit nursing homes provide better care for their patients.
You may ask, “Lateefah, how do you know these things?” I am a Certified Peer Specialist and Health Justice Advocate for a social services law firm. (How I ended up changing careers is an entirely different newsletter.)
Back later this week with my intro to erectile dysfunction in Gen X. Why are dudes in Viagra commercials all 60-something? I feel misled.
XOXO,
Lateefah